Eps 1771: Why Tears of the Kingdom is the worst game of the decade
— The too lazy to register an account podcast
The podcast discusses why Tears of the Kingdom is considered the worst game of the decade. The game is poorly designed, with repetitive and boring gameplay. The story is convoluted and uninteresting, with characters lacking depth and development. The graphics are subpar, with glitches and low resolution textures. The sound design is also lackluster, with unimpressive music and dull voice acting. The game lacks any redeeming qualities, making it a frustrating and disappointing experience for players. Overall, Tears of the Kingdom is a prime example of a poorly executed video game that fails to meet player expectations.
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Host
Heidi Cook
Podcast Content
Hello and welcome to this episode of our podcast, where we will discuss a topic that may not be popular or pleasant for some of you, especially if you happen to be fans of a certain fantasy RPG game called Tears of the Kingdom. Yes, we are going to argue that Tears of the Kingdom is the worst game of the decade, and we have some reasons and evidence to support this claim. If you are curious or skeptical, please keep listening, and if you are offended or outraged, feel free to send us your feedback or counterarguments.
First of all, let's clarify what we mean by the "worst game of the decade." We do not mean that Tears of the Kingdom is the most unplayable, buggy, or broken game ever made, nor do we mean that it is the most hated or criticized game ever made. We mean that Tears of the Kingdom is the most disappointing and underwhelming game that promised so much but delivered so little, especially compared to its hype, budget, and ambition. We also mean that Tears of the Kingdom is the game that embodies some of the worst trends and practices in the gaming industry, such as the culture of preorders, DLC, microtransactions, and loot boxes, as well as the lack of respect for the players' time, money, and intelligence.
So, why do we think that Tears of the Kingdom is the worst game of the decade? Here are some reasons and evidence:
1) The story is generic, predictable, and poorly written.
Tears of the Kingdom is marketed as an epic fantasy RPG with rich lore, complex characters, and moral dilemmas. However, the actual story of the game is a clichéd and shallow collection of tropes and archetypes. You play as a chosen one who has to save the world from an evil sorcerer who wants to unleash an ancient curse that will destroy all life. Along the way, you meet some companions who join you for their own reasons, but they are either one-dimensional stereotypes or cardboard cutouts with no backstory or agency. The dialogues are cringe-worthy and full of exposition, repetition, and awkwardness. The choices you can make are superficial and often lead to the same outcomes. The ending is unsatisfying and anticlimactic, leaving many questions unanswered or unfulfilled.
2) The gameplay is tedious, unbalanced, and grindy.
Tears of the Kingdom is also marketed as a challenging and immersive RPG with tactical combat, skill trees, crafting, and exploration. However, the actual gameplay of the game is a tedious and unresponsive mess of mechanics and systems that do not synergize or evolve. You have to grind for hours to level up and unlock new abilities, but most of them are either useless or overpowered, making the difficulty curve erratic and frustrating. The enemies are either sponges that soak up damage or glass cannons that can one-shot you if you make a single mistake. The boss fights are repetitive and gimmicky, relying on trial and error rather than strategy or tactics. The crafting is shallow and unbalanced, and the resources are either scarce or redundant. The exploration is tedious and uneventful, with few secrets or surprises to discover.
3) The graphics and performance are mediocre and dated.
Tears of the Kingdom is also marketed as a beautiful and immersive RPG with stunning visuals, animations, and soundscapes. However, the actual graphics and performance of the game are a mediocre and dated mess of textures, models, and effects that do not impress or immerse. The environments are either generic or recycled, with few details or variations. The character models are unnatural and robotic, with stiff animations and lip-syncing. The visual effects are either bland or exaggerated, with no consistency or coherence. The soundscapes are either noisy or silent, with no ambient or atmospheric cues. The performance is unstable and buggy, with frequent crashes, freezes, or glitches that disrupt the gameplay or immersion.
4) The marketing and monetization are deceptive and greedy.
Tears of the Kingdom is also marketed and monetized in a way that exploits the hype, fandom, and addiction of the players. The preorders and special editions promise exclusive content and bonuses that do not justify the extra price or value. The DLCs and expansions are overpriced and rarely add anything substantial to the core game or story. The microtransactions and loot boxes are ubiquitous and predatory, encouraging the players to gamble their real money for virtual rewards that are either cosmetic or game-breaking. The updates and patches are slow and inadequate, leaving many bugs and issues unfixed or unacknowledged. The community management and communication are poor and unresponsive, ignoring the feedback or concerns of the players.
So, these are some of the reasons and evidence why we think that Tears of the Kingdom is the worst game of the decade. Of course, some of you may disagree or have different opinions and experiences with the game, and that's fine. We are not here to tell you what to like or dislike, nor are we here to target or insult any individuals or groups. We are here to discuss a topic that we find relevant and meaningful, and to invite you to join the conversation. If you have any feedback or counterarguments, please feel free to send us a message or email, and we will try to respond to them in a respectful and reasonable manner. Thank you for listening, and we hope to see you in the next episode.