Eps 1253: today my best friend betray me
— The too lazy to register an account podcast
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| Content creation: | GPT-3.5, |
Host
Brandie Carter
Podcast Content
She told me that I had to learn to love myself before I could grow up and make a best friend in the right way, and that I would never do it again. I also wish I had spoken up when she demoted me from friend to acquaintance, but I didn't.
I'm not sure what to do. # I have learned that over time the devastating sense of betrayal will pass and those who have been betrayed will emerge stronger and wiser from the ordeal. There are many different ways to deal with a friend's betrayal and how to deal with it in times like these.
I suggest that you treat it as if the best friend who is suffering is the one who has, unfortunately, received more attention from the two who betrayed you. If you want to forgive your friend and move on, but find it difficult, remember that good friends do not grow on trees and that friendship is worth fighting for. And if you have had a similar experience of betrayal by a loved one, you will learn to love yourself more.
On the other hand, after a betrayal, you can meet a person who is extremely important to you, and you can forgive that person and work to rebuild a friendship. If you find the courage to look into your friend's heart and forgive him, it is a positive way to deal with injustice. And if he tells you that he really likes the woman you married and he wants your blessing, then you will continue, just as I can tell him that I really care about her and that his betrayal could have come from me standing in the way.
The best way to overcome your friend's betrayal is to spend time with the friends that did you good, and meet some new ones. Allow yourself to grieve the good memories you have had with your best friend, while relying on other friends and family members to support you. You may have to recognise that lack of emotional investment is at the heart of betrayal and find ways to move forward. If one of you cannot bear the idea of repairing a friendship after a betrayal, then you need support.
If you miss your friend after a betrayal, try not to go back to the person you once were and try to improve other relationships.
Try not to downplay your feelings for a friend who has wronged you, especially if he is letting the situation get out of hand by playing the betrayal card to manipulate you into submitting to their will. Maybe it's not the first time you're hurt by a person and just can't go on, but maybe it's not the second time they hurt you. A friend who may be being pulled away or talking about feelings may not be his friend after all, and he may betray his trust and run straight back to the person who hurt him. Even if you have always been a good friend in the past and need to give good advice, be loyal and enrich your life, betrayal is not enough to counteract it.
The best way to confront a friend who has cheated on you or feels cheated on you is to do it because you love him, and that is what you do.
If one wants to heal from the pain of betrayal, one must allow oneself to experience all the emotions that accompany it. One must deal with the hurt of being betrayed by one's friend, and imagine the anger and hurt one feels at one's betrayal before it takes place in one's heart. Although this is a simplistic way of looking at forgiveness, it makes clear that the emotions of the heart do not have to sustain the negativity of betraying your friends.
When I was at school, the intensity of my bond with my best friend probably made me feel that we would always remain close. I think I could love a girlfriend with this kind of betrayal of best friends, but I can't.
I felt I had lost my friend, but I also lost the one person I could trust more than anyone else. It made me realize that we could no longer be best friends, and then I did something and immersed myself more deeply in my sixth grade self. My friendship was not important enough to discuss our fundamental differences. I feel even more betrayed because I have not only lost a friend, but also a friend. But also I'm not sure what to do. M has lost only one of the people I used to think of as best friends.