Eps 44: active listening

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Max Cooper

Max Cooper

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Active listening involves a listener paying attention to a speakers nonverbal behaviors and body language. Active listening requires that the listener pays attention, understands, reacts, and recalls what is being said within the context of inflection, tempo, and non-verbal signals . Active listening does not just mean fully paying attention to a speaker, it also means actively showing both verbal and non-verbal signs of listening. Active listening is the capacity to fully concentrate on the speaker, to comprehend his or her message, to comprehend the message, and to react in a reflective way.
Active listening is the method of hearing and responding to another that enhances understanding. Active listening is a technique that involves listening carefully and noting nonverbal signals, and giving feedback in the form of precise paraphrasing, and is used for consultation, teaching, and dispute or conflict resolution. Active listening involves different components from a listener, who needs to be aware of what a speaker is trying to convey, and elicit clarification when needed to understand.
Unlike passive listening, which is the act of hearing the speaker but not keeping track of his or her message, active listening makes sure that one is able to participate in, and then remember, the particular details without the need to re-explain information. Memory is important in the listening process, as information retained while an individual is engaged in the listening process is how meaning is extracted from words.
Listening is not something that happens just by accident , listening is an active process where there is a conscious decision made to listen and to understand a speakers message. That is, fully paying attention to what is being said, not simply listening passively to a speakers message. This is when you are making the conscious effort to listen to not just the words that the other person is saying, but, more importantly, to the full message being conveyed.
If you use even 3 or 4 of the skills below, you will find that you are listening to and hearing more of what another person is saying to you. By learning the skills below, you will become a better listener and really listen to what another person is saying - not just what you think they are saying, or what you want to hear.
When you show that you are capable of truly listening to what others are saying, people will have more interest in communicating with you regularly. When we demonstrate that we are truly listening, the person who is talking with you is far more likely to feel valued, and you too will benefit.
We think we are listening to another person, but in reality, we are not giving them our complete attention. The other person does not care that we are listening very closely, unless our responses reflect that. You are not necessarily disagreeing with the person, you are just signaling you are listening.
Allowing another person to talk makes it easier for you to also understand that persons message. Remember, the speaker is using language to express thoughts and feelings in their mind.
To see how important let is, ask yourself if you have ever been involved in a conversation where you wondered whether the other person was listening to what you were saying. When you listen with active engagement, you are completely engaged and absorbed in what the other person is saying. When you are listening actively, it is likely that the other person will talk with you a lot too.
To improve your listening skills, you must make it clear to the other person that you are hearing what he or she is saying. Listening involves paying close attention to what your child is saying. Through your body language, you can communicate to your child that you are interested in what they have to say, and that you are willing to spend the time listening.
Using body language and other cues that indicate that you are listening may help to make sure you are paying attention as well. Having these words easily accessible in your vocabulary may make you a better listener, since you can probably better pick up on the subtleties of your childs feelings. Speaking less and listening more can make you a better knower, more forgiving, and more patient. By being respectful to speakers, keeping an open mind, and showing empathy, you can build the confidence of people you know, and build friendships with people you do not.
Most of the time, we are not listening as well as we could, or sometimes need to. According to Richard Hunsaker, in the well-known listening research, approximately 75% of the time that we are listening, we are actually distracted, occupied, or oblivious.
It is not surprising then, when you first start practicing listening in this way, that it may seem forced, unnatural, and awkward. It can take a lot to get comfortable using active listening; it is a complex skill, requiring parents to tap into a parents gut feelings for what their children might be feeling, or what is underneath their words and actions. Because active listening helps you retain information, it also helps you understand new topics better and recall what you learned so that you can apply it in the future.
Active listening involves listening in all of your senses. A In addition to paying total attention to a speaker, it is important for an active listener to be seen listening too--otherwise, a speaker might conclude that the topic a speaker is talking about is not interesting for a listener. Listeners should not feel the temptation to jump in with questions or comments whenever a few seconds of silence occur.A Active listening involves giving time to another to explore his/her thoughts and feelings, so he/she must be given appropriate time for this. This practice helps you to show an active interest in what the other person has to say, and it makes the other person feel heard -- a way of cultivating empathy and connection.